September 2012
August 2012
rnassachusetts:
college is thousands of dollars but pizza is only like ten so what is the obvious choice here
a-mock-turtle:
Do you guys know what this means
You’re pregnant before a dick’s even in you now
You could be pregnant right now and not even know it
I’m pregnant
you’re pregnant
WE’RE ALL PREGNANT
*hears noises at night*: well this is it this is the end for me I had a good life
*gets shampoo in my eyes*: I guess I'm blind now how am I ever going to see my first born child
*heart is beating fast*: I think I am having a heart attack is this what cardiac arrest is
*a cop walks by*: here I go about to get arrested I probably murdered someone
*taking a test*: don't take your eyes off of this paper you will get caught cheating and get kicked out of school and amount to nothing
*gets a sunburn*: great now I have skin cancer how will I tell my parents
youcunt-lol:
nintendoggystyle:
what if your life is just a movie and billions of people in another dimension are watching it right now
they’re begging for a refund.
“WOHOHO STAY OFF THE ROADS GUYS, ____ HAS THEIR LICENSE”
– every adult when a teen finally gets their drivers license (via shavingryansprivates)
pikaballoons:
if you ever meet me in real life i am so sorry
sorry that your whole world will be wrecked once you realize i’m fifty times cooler in person
yolomeatsix:
Well maybe bands should start paying to see me
“You’re N.F.I. — Not Fucking Invited!”
– Cat Ommaney, RHODC (via margueriteperrin)
ladypandacat:
1612th:
in 4th grade there was this girl who had a collection of furbies and one day she brought like 12 in to class and she was sitting in the back licking them and biting their hair off and i asked her what she was doing and she was like “im feeling them enter me” and then she got sent to the office
what's your favorite type of machine to use at the...
the vending machine
jadefinitelyfeel:
college should be like 50 dollars
